A a few years ago i wrote about what it was like to be a “grown up” man who is 5ft 2in. The piece bemoaned the various height-related hurdles I had to jump (with difficulty) in my teens and twenties; unwanted jokes, difficulty meeting women and a funny saga of injecting growth hormones into the stomach. Today, I’m at peace with my height, but society is still obsessed with it – and the conversation often swings wildly between celebrating the “short king” and labeling an angry little penny with “short man syndrome.”
In Mr. BigstuffA new Sky comedy out on Wednesday, creator Ryan Sampson aims to explore societal perceptions of masculinity. Sampson, who stands at 5ft 4in, stars opposite 6ft Danny Dyer – reputedly one of the manliest men in the world. They encounter carpet shop worker Glen (Sampson) and his bombastic, estranged brother Lee (Dyer) who loves the c-word, as real man.
“As a particularly short gay man, I have been fascinated by masculinity; in all the ways we try and fail to get it right,” Sampson said in an interview earlier this year. “Maybe it’s because of some unresolved short man issues.”
No wonder Sampson has “unresolved short man issues.” Society has a height problem that goes back years.
In 19th century France, Napoleon’s apparent short-sightedness made him the laughing stock of Europe. Nicknamed “le Petit corporal” by his own soldiers, he was widely depicted as a small villain (although historians estimate him to be above the average height of a Frenchman of his era). That stigma has continued and possibly deepened ever since.
Last year — more than two centuries later — a study sought to prove that the Napoleon complex, or “little man syndrome,” really does exist, and that a shorter man is more likely to make you a psychopathic turd. (It should be noted that this perfectly reasonable and not at all insensitive study polled 367 US adults, and only 142 of them were men of less than average height. Talk about proportional representation.)
And in 2004 Journal of Political Economy found that there was a “height premium” in the labor market and concluded that “a 1.8 percent wage increase follows each additional inch of height.”
When it comes to perceptions of masculinity, however, progress has been made in recent years. At least for tall men.
Today, masculinity can look like many things. There is the man of simple pleasures “daddy bod”, lager and favorite sports team. Then there’s the more Chalamet-esque approach: is stunningly beautiful in a slightly, angular way and art. At the most toxic end of the scale, we find the Patrick Batemans of the world who can’t wait to tell you about taking BCAAs or creatine, and guys who would challenge themselves to a “raw dog” flight for fun.
The thing is, short men can be all of these things too. A short, athletic man; a short, well-mannered man; or a short, thinly veiled mane. A short man can apparently even be a prime minister, although Rishi Sunak’s physical height had nothing to do with his awkward position on the world stage. So from where I stand, it’s hard to see (classic) why concerns about masculinity should rub off on me more than the “average” guy – 5ft 10in – or taller.
When I was younger, not being able to grow up affected me deeply. It became clear that, overall, women prefer taller men. When you’re a teenager and all your friends are kissing girls with reckless abandon, that’s the end of it.
That my height worried me so much back then is delightfully pathetic, but it was an early introduction to male standards and a certain kind of masculinity. However, even then, the masculinity issues related to my height did not come from me, but from society and its arbitrary norms.
At 28, I’m happy to report that I’m now kissing a woman (thank you), and while I have more experience with short men in real life, the ratio of my height to my manhood remains the same. : There is not one.
I understand how a good altitude joke can sometimes be an effective ice breaker – I’ve been known to hit below the belt too
Does being shorter make me less masculine? I don’t think so, but by whose standards? I like a pint and a laugh, reading books and going to the gym. Which male category do I belong to? And does it matter?
I owe a lot to my shortness, including the friends I have now and some of the opportunities I’ve been given (like the lead role in the fureer production Jack and the Beanstalk. As a giant. Funny, I know). Shortness is an integral part of my character and has taught me a lot about the kind of man/guy/boy I am.
It has also taught me a lot about what other people are like. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve noticed that it’s usually the same types of guys who keep coming back for short jokes—taller men who are more than likely insecure about their own masculinity. In defense of some, I understand how a good altitude joke can sometimes be an effective ice breaker – I’ve been known to hit below the belt too.
But equating someone’s height with a perceived lack of masculinity is immature at best and a sign of a serious inferiority complex at worst. These are the people who – ironically – need to grow up.
‘Mr Bigstuff’ is out on Sky Max on Wednesday 17 July at 9pm