How are we still drinking the espresso martini?

And I don’t know about you, but in all of my, ahem, professional experience testing cocktails, I’m fairly certain there’s still no significant challenger on the horizon. Both the nitro martini created by Mr Lyan and Hawksmoor’s Clearwater version are delicious, but not widely available; the usual coffee shop substitutions — decaf, matcha, tea — will hardly do the trick; and the disappearance of the only close contender, Cafe Patron (RIP), sent the country into national mourning. Meanwhile, yes, the Irish coffee at Swift is the best, but nobody wants a warm summer cocktail. And have you ever tried a coffee old fashioned? Don’t even think about it.