Here in Britain, crisps are an undisputed part of the fabric of daily life.
What’s a lunchtime sammie without a few slices tucked between the bread, offering extra salty crunch? What’s a picnic without a ridiculously posh bag nestled up beside the hummus and sausage rolls? What, I ask you, is a box set marathon without a packet rustling companionably between you?
Rubbish, that’s what. Still, most reasonable adults would draw the line at having crisps for dinner, but for a week, it’s on the menu, as part of a marketing stunt from Doritos.
The tortilla chip brand is holding Doritos Loaded Week from August 22-31, involving more than 100 of London’s restaurants and street food stalls, including the likes of Smoketeers BBQ, Poptata and, er, Chin Chin, the liquid nitrogen ice cream joint in Soho.
Just bring your own bag of Doritos — any size, any flavour — and the vendors will pile on their respective specialities for a fiver.
Isn’t that just nachos, you might ask? Quite possibly, if you hit a Mexican food participant. But, on the promise of trying loaded combos that would “make my taste buds lose their minds” (their words, clearly), I tried four options before Loaded Week kicked off — and there wasn’t a dollop of guac in sight.
Will Ireland/PinPep
Starting strong in Soho, Chin Chin’s loaded offering involves a bed of Tangy Cheese Doritos, splattered with bright green jalapeno hot sauce, surrounding a cheese-shaped chunk of ice cream encased in yellow chocolate. Your socials will love it, but did I?
Cracking through the frozen shell and into the savoury cheese-flavoured ice cream underneath took some welly – a shard or two may have pinged onto the neighbouring table from brute force. Was it worth the effort? Surprisingly tasty for cheesy ice cream, it turns out. There’s a layer of crushed Cool Original Doritos waiting at the bottom of the choc ice, serving as a cheesecake base, adding welcome saltiness to all the rich cheesy cream, and the jalapeño added a zippy little lift.
The bad news? It’s available only on August 27, a one-hit wonder. Good news? It’s free for the first 200 customers who bring a bag of Doritos to fill.
Mac on crack: The Mac Factory
Avea shawn
Camden is packed with Doritos Loaded Week vendors, and my first stop was at The Mac Factory beside Camden Lock. A regular-sized packet of Cool Original was snipped open sideways so the vendor had more room to pour in the gooey mac and cheese topped with pulled pork, pickled jalapeños and fried onions, finished with lashings of sauce. I could feel my arteries bracing any time I glanced down at the gaping bag, protesting with molten cheese.
Was this why I insisted we split one bag amongst three? Possibly. It was enough to actually enjoy it without feeling felled by carb-on-carb action.
Brisket loading: Smoketeers
Avea shawn
Across the road and into the newly opened Hawley Wharf part of Camden Market to Smoketeers BBQ. The Regents Canal view was gorgeous, right up until the guys behind the counter unlocked their fridge-sized smoker, and my head, led by my nose, whipped over to the scene inside. Brisket city.
Smoked for hours, the tender beef offered zero resistance on the chopping board before being piled onto waiting share bags of Original Salted Doritos. It’s crowned with a light cheese sauce and a lively chimichurri to bring a faint suggestion of health to the proceedings. Of all the dishes I tried, Smoketeers really made a meal of it. The tastiest, the juiciest, and for a fiver, hands down the best value, especially if you take a sharing bag. Great frozen margs, too.
The chip off the old block: Poptata
Avea shawn
With my centre of gravity severely under fire after eating three loaded bags of Doritos, I found myself standing in front of Poptata, my final stop. This food stall’s thing is chips on steroids; British spuds, twice fried, and smothered in toppings, sauces and garnishes.
For Loaded Week, they’ve switched potato sticks for Dorito chips with Korean BBQ Loaded served over a bag of Cool Original.
Sweet, salty, tangy, spicy: all the flavours, all at once. It hits. The bite-sized chicken tenders were crispy and fresh, with pickled onions adding extra vinegary crunch. They weren’t shy with the gochujang BBQ sauce either, so abundant it trickled down into the Doritos underlayers (as it should) and pooled into the corners of the packet.
It usually costs around £10 at Poptata with fries; the Doritos hack means it will cost just half that until the end of August. I could think of worse ways to spend a fiver.
Doritos Loaded Week runs from August 22 – 31, involving more than 100 restaurants and street food stalls in London.